Archive for May, 2010

May 27, 2010

i’m just a girl with a bad reputation

by badmammy

I’m bad, we all know that. I mean, just look at my handle: Badmammy. I do like it. I prefer to think of my badness as an asset & a positive thing. I tell myself that I’m bad like in coolness or hipness. I know (& most folks who know me agree) that I am not a mean or vicious person. I can not tell you when my last fist fight was & don’t believe I’ve even had a good argument with anyone in a long time, not since “the insane hormonal years”, at least. These days I’m all about peace & love, after all. I work on it every day.

There was a time in my life when I was full of anger & could really throw down. I could kick, holler, scream & cuss with the best of ‘em. Growing up with three younger brothers, who, it seemed to me, spent their child hoods devoted to pestering me & making me screech “MOOOOOOM!” I developed survival skills similar to Navy Seals. These skills served me well for most of my life but I’ve been working on outgrowing those urges & like to believe in my progress.  Maybe it has to do with my lazy nature but I just don’t have it in me to fight anymore. Not much seems worth it. If I had cancer, I would fight that. Maybe. I will still peacefully fight for human rights or equality. If you mess with my kids or family, I’ll be on you before you or I have time to think about it. You can bet if you’re beating a kid or a dog in the parking lot, I’m gonna say something. I’ll be mad about that, all right, but I’ll call the cops.

But the past? Something I have no control over? No, that can’t make me mad anymore. I refuse. There are regrets, of course, broken hearts, disappointments & just about a millions things I won’t do again. But, I’m not gonna be mad.

Maybe I’ve moved into another type of madness!

“You’ve got to let go of anger” I say, with the wave of a hand. “It will eat you up.” “Walk On.” “Two tears in a bucket . . . . . .”

All of this has been on my mind a lot lately. Maybe because one day last week I heard from four different relatives, all of whom I dearly love, making plans to get together & telling me I could go too, if I “behaved” & didn’t “start something.” Let me tell you right now that none of these comments are based on my bad behavior in the past. I’ve never started a rumble at a funeral, never stood up at a wedding when the preacher man asked if anyone had objections, never even got drunk at a reunion & decided to tell somebody about themselves.

“Why is everyone telling me to behave?” “Am I really so bad?” “Don’t these people know me better than that?” I cried to Big Daddy.

The love of my life proceeded to do the most aggravating thing in the world. He quoted me back to myself! Gulp. And, I have to admit, it was very good advice. He calmly pointed out to me how incredibly lucky I am to have these folks in my life, how much I love them, how much they love me. In the words of Cher, in Moonstruck, he said “snap out of it!”

And, you know, I started thrillin. Thrillin. Thrillin, Yipeeeeeee. Ima git me a new dress!

And if all I have to do is “be nice”, then, heck, I would’ve done that anyway.

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May 22, 2010

first official, documented turtle sighting of the year

by badmammy

june bug being shy

I saw junebug out & about today.

not quite as happy to see me as I was to see him

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May 15, 2010

how I found love with a power tool

by badmammy

Spring has sprung here in New Mexico. The hummerbirds are buzzing, every plant in the state is pollinating & the wind is blowing like heck. We are loving the warmer weather &  have been able to open the (new!) windows & doors to air out the house. As a result, the entire house is coated in a layer of dust. Pollen, dust & love are alive & dancing in the air. Tumbleweeds of dog hair are gathered in the corners & under the furniture. It’s a beautiful thing.

Yes, between sneezing fits, even I have a new love in my life this year. It hasn’t replaced an old love, just added itself to the vast array of people & things I adore. And, sure enough, it was right there under my running nose & before my itchy red eyes all along. I can hear my Grandmother now . . . . “If it had been a snake, it wouldda bit cha.”  Grandmother also said some things about things being right under our noses if we would but look and something else about already having everything we need.

Sure enough, she was right. Looking at all the dust on even the vertical surfaces & walking on gritty floors, feeling almost buried under all the dirt & just about on the edge of allergy induced despair, the lightenin bolt hit me. The answer was sitting there in the garage. I walk past it all the time.

The shop vac!! I rolled it into the house, plugged in that big orange cord & went to town on the dust & dirt. I love it!! You don’t have to be so particular about what you suck up like you would with the Hoover. I started with the floors then worked my way across the furniture & out the side patio door. I sucked up all kinds of stuff out there! It was so much fun. I cleaned up dead leaves, cobwebs, sticks, dirt & some mardi gras beads. I cleaned out the flower beds. Usually this job takes quite awhile using a broom, dustpan & trash can. Plus, then I have to drag it all through the house out to the alley. The flower beds usually involve a lot of bending & stooping. With the shop vac you just add another length of tube & keep going. Much easier on this old gal.

Another benefit to the shop vac is no bags or little containers to empty. I just rolled it back into the garage & left it. Ha ha. It’s great.